As I just finished my demo for the month I thought to myself:
“My mix sounds like horseshit.”
You must have seen that meme about the creative process?
The “this is awesome – this is tricky – this is shit – I am shit – this might be OK – this is awesome” cycle?
Whereas last week I thought my song was the bomb diggity, right now I think it’s pretty F-ing SHIT.
I’ve vlogged about the terror of song-finishing-week before.
BUT… I’m not posting this to get hugs or feedback from you that “it’s not shit” or anything of that nature.
(Although hugs? Tempting…)
No, I’m posting this because I’m OK with thinking that it’s shit 🙂
I wasn’t able to spend as much time on my music as I normally do, because…oh well, I moved from Singapore to the Netherlands this month. Nothing big 😉
But my main point is that, aside from all the shittiness I currently perceive in this version of this track (note the nuance), I don’t go to that “I AM shit” place anymore.
And oh ma gawd…that’s SO freeing.
I’m no longer running with the “I’ll never get this” or “let’s forget about this music thing” – thoughts or God -knows – whatever – self – defeating – stories I would have told myself a few years ago.
I may currently think the song is shit, but not that my creative potential is shit.
Because I am not the song.
And I am not my art.
So, I’m just gonna not care, whip my hair and put it on my Soundcloud anyway!
The demo in question is right below!
Though I may not have motivated you just now to take listen, have I? Lol.
Maybe I should write a guide called “How NOT to pitch a song – 101” (it probably includes calling it “horseshit”, oh well)
You ARE in fact welcome to have a listen my friend. It’s poppy and energetic.
In any case…
LET’S NOT WAIT WITH SHARING OUR CREATIVITY UNTIL IT’S FLAWLESS HMKAY?
Only Queen B wakes up like that, as we all know.
PS: I’m now officially looking for someone to help me mix/master my demos so that I can focus on what I do best, which is everything that comes BEFORE the mixdown. So, do let me know if you know someone that knows someone.
Happy remaining Sunday and don’t forget to whip your hair this week!Continue reading
I just finished my new demo “Wait Is Over”! You can check it below 🙂
This one is all about:
And, ALLOWING it to be easy…
The lyrics I write are usually quite simple.
They’re a bit like affirmations that I want to repeat over and over, so that I can pierce my whole being with them.
Words that I let marinate in my mind, again and again, so that they become my new reality.
Purposeful phrases that become my default, so that I can live a brave, soul-fueled life and not a life limited by my fearful mind.
For me, right now, believing in myself means moving back to the Netherlands after almost 2 years of living in Singapore.
Living here has been the most amazing and unexpected experience of my life.
It’s finishing week!
Okay I know, I already said that last week… But there is finishing week and then there is ACTUAL finishing week.
Finishing week means: the week I INTEND to finish my song.
Actual finishing week means: the week I ACTUALLY finish it.
The week I will actually finish it, because I have a deadline.
The week I will actually finish it, because I will hate myself more than I will hate the song if I don’t.
The week I will actually finish it, because I’m not a quitter, yo.
Finishing week MAY include mild frustration and despair and pondering about the existence (or non existence) of my talent.
ACTUAL finishing week may or may not include the 2.0 version of that, binge eating and some form of alcohol, daily.
Just kidding, just kidding.